There is a blessed perspective and a bellyful of laughs that come from having an 8-year-old around the house. Here are just a few snippets of conversation with her that manage to make us giggle and keep us grounded:
On Pilates
Me: "I just did 20 roll ups."
Kiddo: "They looked like regular sit-ups to me."
Me: "I've been trying to get these right for months."
Kiddo: "You'll have to do a lot more if you wanna catch up."
On My Blog
Me: "Hey, Smilin' Vic, Kiddo, I have 4 subscribers."
Smilin' Vic: "Cool."
Kiddo: "What are subscribers?"
Me: "People who want to read my blog."
Kiddo: "Cool, then they can use your ideas."
Me: "I guess."
Kiddo: "So you only have 4 subscribers in THE WHOLE WORLD?"
Me: (heavy sigh) "Yeah ... "
On Food Choices
Me: "If you don't eat meat, it's hard to get all your protein and be healthy. "
Kiddo: "Just because you want to eat something that was happier alive doesn't mean I have to. Can I just have beans, please? "
On Boobs
Kiddo: "How come women have to wear tops but men don't always?"
Me: "Because men don't have breasts."
Kiddo: "I saw men with boobs at the beach."
Me: "Are you done your homework?"
On Death
Kiddo: "Maman, how come people have to die?"
Me (thinking hard): "Because you start to get pretty bored of living once you're past a hundred or so."
Kiddo (thinking hard): "I'm pretty sure I'd rather be bored."
On Desert Fashion
Kiddo: "I'm happy you don't have to wear an abaya, Maman."
Me: "Why's that?"
Kiddo: "Because then no one would get to see your new bra."
Me (silently, in my head): "Note to self: Ditch the shirt ... apparently it's transparent in sunlight."
On Driving in Doha
Me (in the front seat to Smilin' Vic): "Is that driver crazy, blind, or both?"
Kiddo (in the back seat): "I don't think blind crazy people are allowed to drive in Canada, are they Maman?"
Smilin' Vic and Me: sorry, this part was unintelligible through the peals of laughter ...
Everyday traffic in Doha ...
On Driving in Doha, Part 2
Kiddo: "Why is there always so much traffic in Doha?"
Me: "I don't know ... the roads are too small, there are too many cars, no trains ..."
Kiddo: "Maybe it's 'cause the crazy blind people drive really slow."
Me (silently, in my head): "Time to really start watching my big mouth around Kiddo."
On Michelle Pfeiffer
Kiddo: "Maman, that lady looks just like you."
Me: "And that, my child, is why you will go far in life."
There's just something so crazy great about an eight-year-old's perspective.